Religion And Programming

It's the perfect combination. A belief in God (in this context i am referring to the Christian God, only because that is what i am familiar with) and the need to do his will fits so well with programming a child. This carries on into adulthood especially if the child's parents reinforce these Christian beliefs. It is easy to hide a program within the guise of it being God's will. Once the belief and faith in God is set, and the belief in the need to do his will is set as a foundation, it is easy for the programmer to use terminology that makes the person feel they are being unfaithful to God if they don't follow through. Therefore again having more power for many years to come. It doesn't help that the bible contains so many verses that can again be used to reinforce what the programmer wants. As an adult, walking away from the programs and abuse of the past, it is very hard to separate what is truly God's will and what is a program. I think many people go through a time of religious searching or curiosity at some stage in their lives, whether they were raised in a religious context or not. How more difficult for someone within this programmed belief of God, to feel free to explore and find the truth of what works for them. Are my thoughts and beliefs in God my own, or merely those planted many years ago by a manipulative force for their own benefit. I know God and Christianity were used within my programming, and i have seen it in many others who have been programmed. I am not sure however, how to break free from the program and believe for myself.

Finding Michael

Getting pregnant within the group was common.  They had some of us girls they called breaders.  We were to get pregnant to provide babies/ children to be used by the group.  Most births were unregistered and most of these children didn't make it through their first year of life.  They were often used to manipulate and control the mothers. We had 4 pregnancies within the group.  The first 2 died before birth.  The 3rd I am not sure of, and the fourth got to live.  I remember seeing him aged about 3/4 years old.  He was staying with other people.  We weren't allowed to keep him.  They made us forget about him so that we would just get on with life and not look for him. A few months ago the memory of him came back. The question now burning in our mind is, 'is he still alive? ' could we find him? Be reunited? The chances are so slim, but we want to try.  They called him Michael.
We have an appointment this week with someone who may be able to help us.  But do we dare to hope.  The chances are so slim.  But we have to try.