The Greatest Despair

The greatest despair we have is the knowledge that they made us hurt others. We were forced to hurt and abuse other children just like us. It was not something we ever wanted to do but we knew that we risked our life and theirs if we did not do it. They were children, often younger than us and we used or size and power to intimidate them just as it was done to us. Some of these children we knew, some we knew very well, to well. We hurt them when we should have protected them, and somewhere inside are those who are pleased with this and the job they carried out. They felt it gave them a sense of power and strength. But i and others with must live with the knowledge of what was done by us to others. It makes me sick to my stomach. But we must go on.